Saturday, June 13, 2009

Sunday is Funday

So it's not even the 2nd week of the holidays and I'm already bored out of my brainz. So far I've seen about half of Season 1 of X Files, watched Season 1 of Skins again, watched all of Arrested Development again, played World of Warcraft (lol), drank about 4 bottles of different juices (5 Fruits, Orange & Mango, Apple, Apple Banana Mango and LOL Juice - yes there is such a thing), listened to the entire B.I.B.L.E album (Killah Priest, not Jesus) and watched all of Peep Show. On YouTube as well so now my net is capped like a motherfucker.

Sunday ain't funday I lied. Got nothing to do. JACK. SHIT.

That's what I got from Google-ing Jack Shit. Awesome right?!

I found Osama Bin Laden on Twitter. Possibly like one of the most funniest things ever. God is pretty funny too but that's overrated. I used to have God on FB too and it got OLD SO FAST.

Suffa from the Hilltop Hoods is the funniest dude in Hip Hop. Suffa's letter to the Oscars.

What kind of Star Wars character am I?

You mean there's a way I can find out?


Tell me!

Don't you be fucking with me on this, I need to know.

This is important shit!!

TELL ME!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sorry... I shouldn't have grabbed you... it's just... it's just that this means a lot to me. It's something I've always wanted to know. So how, nah man, I'm calmed down now, so how do I find out? I just click here? Cool and then I do this stupid quiz? Okay, is there a way it could waste more of my time? Oh really? I see, it's going to take a while.

Wow, it worked. It turns out I'm the kind of Star Wars character that thinks you're an idiot for thinking that I'd want to know what type of Star Wars character I am. It says it right here, see? It also says that I'm the kind of Star Wars character that hates those cute quizzes. It's amazing how much it knows about me.

I saw a thing on telly last night which is a baby name predictor. So what you do is you SMS the name of your partner and your name and it tells you the perfect name for your child should you have children. Now, unless it buzzes you back with the name, "Born Out Of Wedlock", it's wrong.

Can you imagine if that's how you were given your name?

"Well my name means Sunrise in Greek"
"Really? Mine means honesty, my parents chose it when they were visiting a temple in Nepal and this monk blessed my mother's stomach and nine months later I was born"
"That's so romantic, I love that story, what about you?"
"Yeah, what's the story behind your name?"
"My parents were hungover, watching Video Hits and this retarded ad came on, and because my parents are idiots they decided to text in and that's how I got my name"
"I'm sure..."
"No, it is... they are idiots"
"But they love you and that's the main thing"
"Love me? Do you think that two people who are using a text message service to choose a child's name are still together? Are you mental? They broke up before I was born."
"Well... I still think that you've got a nice name"
"I was just say..."
"You like my name?"
"Yeah, we all do, don't we girls? It's unusual"
"Would you want my name?"
"Would. You. Want. My. Name?"
"Well, I love my name"
"Just answer me, would you want my name? So you're no longer Julia... Just as I thought, and do you know why? Because Crazy Frog is a stupid-arse name, given to me by two idiots."

Anyway it's really annoying when kids wear band t-shirts when they don't know who they are or they just like the design. I remember seeing a girl at school ages ago who was like in year 9 and she was wearing a Ramones tshirt and I said "Oh cool, you like the Ramones. What's your favourite song?" and she said "Stairway to Heaven". I could've died/killed her.That's why there should be a quiz for anyone who wants to buy any iconic band t shirt. It should be a written and oral exam with a pass grade of 95%. Anything less will result in the compulsory purchase of Thirsty Merc tshirts, bottle opener and/or keyring. So next time you think about buying a Ramones or Sex Pistols tshirt you must know who exactly who the punk rocker on your shirt is, who is his girlfriend is and in 25 words or less, explain why it could be argued that he contributed nothing to Sex Pistols.

Celebrity Death Prediction: Heidi and Spencer Pratt
Method of Death: Crazy Frog

Yours truly,
Johnny Ramone/Sid Vicious/Jimmy Page

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